I really hate to pick on a preacher while on vacation, so I won’t. Still, there was something in the sermon today which reminded me of my own shortcomings and caused me to become a tad grumpy with myself, especially recalling what I was like as a preacher. Sometime during the sermon the preacher illustrated and identified with us on how hard it is to maintain a desire for God’s Word. He spoke quite honestly about the difficulty in doing daily devotions, and made the connection about the difference in having to do something and getting to do something. I’m not sure if the scope of his sermon really would have accounted for what I wanted to hear next, so he may be justified in leaving it out: the preacher never told us how to overcome the struggle he illustrated. This is particularly irksome to me, because that is what I lack in my sermons and in my life (and it is also what I am working on to develop in my life).
One of the reasons I decided to step away from ministry is my lack of life experience. I do not yet have children, I have been married only two years, and I still have many trials to face in life. When I was in ministry I could not identify with the congregation as easily as I wanted. I could not identify with their struggles, I did not know how to help them out of a particular struggle (since I had not faced it), all I could offer them was the obvious destination they wanted to reach and offer to pray for and/or with them. I did not have the “how” figured out; I had the “why” and the “what” but never the “how”. So when I heard the same in the sermon today I reflected back on my own shortcomings, and became frustrated. One day I will have some of the “hows” and hopefully then I will be of greater use to the Christian community.