I don’t like to say it, but I’m scared. I’m scared because I can find more web sites, more literature, and more people who share only one thing in common: they object to my morality. My morality is a Christian morality, and while the Bible tells us we are to expect persecution for our beliefs (morals included) it is not a comfortable thought. It is a downright bone-chilling, frightening, thought. My usual action is to ignore my fear, ignore the negative views, comments, and speeches. It is getting harder, and I am beginning to worry. I worry not because I actually think my life will be endangered, I expect we are far from that. I worry because I think that I will begin to be attacked, I will personally face the vehemence and vitriol of those who despise my moral convictions.
Life in high school was hard. I was a nerd, I had moral convictions, and I was unpopular. I was frequently assailed and too frequently assaulted. I have been different all my life, and I don’t mind being different, but I don’t like be attacked because of it. The pressure is always there to change myself to avoid the hardships, but it is hard to change when you are convicted and convinced you are right. It’s also hard to change when the only pressure to change is pressure by force, at such times pride kicks in making me only stronger. There is virtue in maintaining one’s integrity in the face of persecution and hardship, but there is no virtue in maintaining a position when that position is wrong.
Christian morality and theology is exclusive. Statements of belief are formed that come into direct conflict with other views, sometimes prevailing views. At such times it is easy for us Christians to say the world around us needs to change (and I agree). However, I think we forget the world around us will react to our pressure in much the same way we now react to theirs. It is easy for me to maintain my beliefs, it is easy for me to express them, it is hard for me to encounter people firmly opposed to my beliefs. These encounters always leave me feeling as if I have a mortal enemy, when in truth they are an enemy of God, not me.
I am here to preach a message a of salvation from Hell, a message motivated by love. I understand the fearful penalty of sin, and the consequences of dying without Christ. I defend my morality because the consequences of immorality are staggering, and wholly unpleasant. This is perhaps why attacks against my morality, against my faith, and ultimately against me hurt, and why I am scarred. It is a rare day that I would wish evil upon someone (in my human frailty I have been known to fail and actually wish evil upon someone), so anyone who would wish evil upon me, anyone who would attack me, for having the integrity and love to warn of a terrible eternal destiny and the means of avoiding it, causes me to tremble with sorrow (sometimes tears) … for reasons I do not yet understand.
Maranatha sweet Lord, but first, allow this servant to introduce You to lost souls, and may they not turn away Your gift with scorn.