Entries tagged with “Friends” from Chilling Words
Say what you will about change, but it happens. Some changes are for good, some are for ill, and some . . . some are just changes. Some changes can be prepared for, and some are unexpected and forced upon unsuspecting people. From my perspective the two biggest changes a person can go through are marriage and children. We have a culture about giving advice to engage couples about marriage; any couple anywhere can go through pre-marital counseling, and get an idea of what things will be different and some of the changes that will take place. Funny thing is, we don't seem to have anything of the sort for having children.
Most of the married friends I have already have children. Children being what they are, in a blink of an eye and all these children of our friends are already having birthdays. Their lives have changed, but something else changed, something I never would have thought of: our relationship with our friends have been subtly altered. I'm still trying to put words to the changes I have seen, and still trying to grasp the changes that will come about in the future, as children grow older, more are added, and my wife and I start having some of our own.
Last night I got to see Chad Bault in concert. Chad is a good friend of mine, but good in a different sense. I have not seen Chad in nine months, previously I had to measure the time in years, and truthfully we have not spent great amounts of time growing our friendship. This is what makes my friendship with Chad a heartwarming thing, for despite these things Chad has always been warm, happy, and genuinely pleased to see me when I make my sporadic appearances. This is perhaps why I count it such a privilege to know Chad, and to be able to support his music; he is one of those friends who will always be a friend, despite the "dry spells" in the relationship. Good friends are hard to find, and good and faithful friends seem to be rarer than gold. Such friends help to restore my faith in humanity, help to curb my cynicism, and warm me up to being friendlier in general.
As I stood in the back and listened to the music I could not help but feel a warmth in my heart. I wish I could explain it better, but I'm still trying to grasp it myself. There is something moving about watching a friend whom you care for, doing what he (or she) dreams about. There is also something satisfying knowing you are doing something to support your friend, especially when you can do it "behind the scenes" yet have an effect. Beyond this I cannot explain or understand why I wanted to beam with pride and joy seeing Chad sing and play.
Today I received an invitation to Orkut and I admit I was a bit excited to see it since it has been locked under an invitation-only registration. Going into it I knew it was a social/friend network, but I did not know how it would be presented or what I might find. After inputting all my information (and there was a great amount asked for) I found myself face-to-face with an old and familiar problem with our English language. I was able to gather two friends and invite two new ones when I was notified a total stranger marked me as a friend (asking for confirmation). This has caused me to consider quite a few things and re-investigate the depths of friendship.
I have long held a high standard for my friends, something which made my High School years difficult as none of my classmates met with my standards to make them actual "friends" yet they were more than acquaintances. I longed for a word I could use to describe our relationship, something which would not offend them (by calling them not-friend) but would not elevate their position higher than I considered. I have been fortunate to find a few people who I can truly call friends, and they are exceptional people. I do not want to demean my relationship with them by tossing people who are say casual friends into the same pool.
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