The Lighter Side of Absolute Zero

I’m starting a new job in a week and a half; it’s a work-from-home programming gig, and I’ll likely never meet my other co-workers face-to-face. It is a distributed office with people on three different countries. Early this week I received and email from my future-boss and he asked that I submit a two paragraph bio, presumably to be shared with the rest of the company so they might get to know me better.

So I’ve been trying to figure out just what to say in only two paragraphs, and trying to decide just how long I’ll make my paragraphs. Not to sound too pompous but like most people I’m rather more complex than just two paragraphs. I have three major passions in my life, a small handful of hobbies, and thirty-one years of personal history that may or may not be relevant. I’m at a loss for what to say in only two paragraphs.

Oh well. I guess this means they won’t get to know me very well from my bio. Maybe it won’t matter. After all, they will only read my words and hear my voice (or snores, as I’m sure to have some early morning meetings).

Posted by Seth Croston Barber at 12:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

It disturbs me that there is a segment of American Christianity that treats “Christian” as some kind of brand name. We have Christian music, Christian novels, Christian ties and t-shirts, Christian videos, and just the other day I was asked if there were any Christian video games. I thought the goal, point, and purpose of Christianity was to cultivate a relationship with God, as revealed in the Bible. To that end how can clothing, fiction, and games be Christian? Obviously we can find some that would violate the moral code contained within Christianity, so those would be non-Christian or possibly even anti-Christian. But the opposite would not hold true.

If Christians want to avoid participating in anti-Christian behavior, then I will proudly nod in agreement. If they want to do that by creating some Christian branded form of the same behavior then I must look at them askance and ask, “What part of this is overtly Christian such that we should call it thus?” I wonder, are the Christians around me trying to not befriend the world but going to far as to secede from the world?

Posted by Seth Croston Barber at 3:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

How does one assess their financial worth as an employee? What do you do when you look around you, assess your budget, and realize that you are barely paying the bills, with no savings, no retirement plan, and no hope for the future? How do you go about proving your value to the company in terms of salary and benefits? How do you ask for, and justify, a raise?

Posted by Seth Croston Barber at 9:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBacks (0)

(As to my long absence it’s due to a new job and the changes that entails.)

What is it about bedtime? There is something about staying up past your normal bedtime that for me brings about a relaxation I cannot achieve at any other time of day or night. Even if it’s dark and I can turn down the lights, close the curtains and pretend it’s past bedtime it still doesn’t feel the same.

Late nights is when my creativity sparks. I feel the most productive, the most alive, and the most relaxed late at night. But why?

Posted by Seth Croston Barber at 11:41 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I know what I like to read. I know that if I pick up a fantasy book I’ll probably enjoy it, in fact I probably don’t need to read the synopsis. I can pick up a sci-fi book, read the synopsis and make an intelligent decision about reading it (perfect track record too). I can do the same thing with mysteries (though these days I’m sick and tired of murder mysteries so my reading in that area has slacked off). Everything has been rosy, except for horror stories; I’ve been real hit-or-miss, even with reading the synopsis. I have my suspicions for why I’m failing.

Allow me to invoke Lovecraft yet again, for his stories are a shining example of what I’m looking for in horror stories. First and foremost Lovecraft didn’t write horror; he considered his stories “weird fiction” (two of his essays claim that anyway). I don’t read stories to scare myself, I just don’t think it’s possible. But I do like reading weird stories; for me it’s another aspect of imaginative fantasy; it’s another escape into the unknown away from the mundane.

Now it seems to me that a good synopsis of your average horror story will in some way spoil the story. You can’t ruin the suspense of a story without ruining the story, and from my reading most horror stories are about that “Gotcha!” moment, and so often it is that moment that turns me off to the story with a “too lame” comment.

Could it be that I can’t find a good horror story because good horror is hard to come by? Could it be that I need to find a better classification for what I want to read (weird fiction)? It is just too hard to give readers advance warning about a horror story without giving it away? Or is horror too encompassing as a classification and thus it will always have the problem of finding readers. A ghost story isn’t a monster story, nor a vampire chasing werewolves story; horror, like fantasy, is a broad category which can encompass many themes.

In the end maybe the problem is all about theme and thematic elements. Maybe that’s all it is, or maybe it’s still more than that. Thoughts?

Disclaimer: I have read far more fantasy and sci-fi than horror. This could very well be an anomaly due to lack of exposure.

Posted by Seth Croston Barber at 5:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBacks (0)

I’m in a bit of a quandary and I’m a bit discouraged and bummed out. It’s no secret that I enjoy H. P. Lovecraft’s stories; his stories scratch and itch of mine like no other author has. We tend to emulate the people we look up to, those we admire, and in my case I’ve given this some thought. So imagine my dismay when the aspect of his stories I want to emulate were maligned on a Lovecraft mailing list.

In particular the author of the post accused that Lovecraft fell into a stylistic rut of having a lone survivor present his testimony after the fact, and then meet some horrific end. These are exactly the stories that excite me and scratch that aforementioned itch; likewise this is the type of story I want to write. From my perspective these kind of stories make perfect sense, so allow me to defend them.

In my opinion a first person narrative carries more emotion, more immersion, more atmosphere, and more identity than a third person account. A first person account is personal; it’s easier to believe the account was left behind just for you, and no one else, and that alone can add weight to the tale. A first person account is just like sitting down with a friend and having him recount some grizzly tale, and it’s always more frightening when he’s telling his own tale and not someone else’s: it’s easy to distance yourself from and dismiss a story that is in the third person.

I’ve thought about first person narratives and it seems to me the only tense that makes sense is aorist, or perhaps a perfect tense (one year of Greek and already I’m erudite). The events have to have taken place in the past; it would make sense if they were currently happening; if that were the case there would be no story and you would be there in person witnessing it all firsthand. So now it seems the only way to tell a first person story is if you lived through the events long enough to write about them, hence you will be reading the accounts of a survivor (possibly lone). You could mix it up and have a ghost tell the story, but that’s just a gimmick and one I dismiss as weak.

For me these are the kinds of stories that really strike my fancy. They are the only things that have come close to creeping me out. Maybe I’m alone in this, but any writer who does not write for himself is missing out on the joy writing can bring. In the end I’ll probably not feel comfortable widely sharing my stories that emulate this style. Too bad too because I wonder what Lovecraft would have said.

Posted by Seth Croston Barber at 2:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

I was recently talking with a friend of mine and each of us confessed we have never been scared by a book, and in truth feel no contents of any book will ever instill even a remote sense of fear. I’m sure psychologists everywhere have opinions on why this is, and frankly I don’t much care. I’m not sure I read stories to scare myself, I’m not even sure if I like being scared (and I’ve read articles stating scary movies succeed because we like being scared). And yet, when the weather cooperates and casts a pallor of gloom around me, you will be sure to find me in a dimly lit room (candles if I can) devouring as much Lovecraft and other “masters” as I can find. You might even be treated to an impromptu ghost story of my own creation.

So what am I writing when I write a horror story if I concede I will not scare anyone with it? If I am not writing to frighten, then what am I doing exactly? I’m still coming to grips with why I read, but it seems to me, from my perspective only, horror literature isn’t about fright and terror in the reader’s psyche, it’s about something else, something I can’t put my claw finger on.

Posted by Seth Croston Barber at 10:12 AM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

I’m listening to a book (so far it’s good, but I’ll reserve final judgement for when it’s finished) and in this book a couple of rare books come take center stage for a while. The author describes them in a rich tactile way, making you want to reach out and touch, hold, even caress the books. There is still something about books, an actual physical book, that is pleasing. I love to read books, and I’ll have to admit I like collecting them as well. I have quite an alarming number of eBooks in my collection I want to read, but there is still something mysterious, perhaps bordering on the mystical, about handling a physical book. What is it about books? Why do they hold a fascination with me, and why is it more preferable to read out of a soft bound leather book than an eBook with all the annotation, dictionaries, and bookmark support you could think of. What strange sway do books hold over me (and possibly others)?

Posted by Seth Croston Barber at 11:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I have always been flummoxed when a woman will openly and even boldly talk about the removal of her reproductive organs. I always feel like it will be a sensitive issue, and I try to make sure I have some appropriate measure of empathy whenever the [horrifying] subject of hysterectomies come up, but so far it’s all been for nothing. I’ve not yet met a woman who had one who was ashamed or embarrassed to admit it. Contrast that with men and you get a much different story. Men do not want to talk about castration, even if it’s a medical procedure that would save their lives, it’s sacrosanct. I always assumed women were the same way, and I usually find they are more sensitive than us brutish men, but I guess, thus far, this is one area where the opposite is true.

Posted by Seth Croston Barber at 11:04 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)